#mylittlepony - #A pretty late post about my reaction to e23 - Sounds of Silence

A pretty late post about my reaction to e23 - Sounds of Silence

So yeah I'm just now catching up on S8, was way too busy to watch anything for a while.

After binging the last 20ish episodes I watched this one and apart from it being just one of my favorites, it has something pretty special to me.

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Back in 8th grade I got into a fight with another kid. He insulted my Grandmother and I was having non of it, so I hit him pretty hard. It turned out pretty bad as the school sent me home for 2 weeks and the police got involved (and nothing came of it). I really did not enjoy the experience so I decided that getting angry was pretty pointless, since it's just going to cause pain to someone. So 14 year old me decided to kind of block out the emotion of anger.

It started out just fine, I felt pretty good and hey, I wasn't getting angry because that's a useless and pointless emotion. Over the following years, a pretty major side-effect of this started to appear - I started to lose all of my emotions. It got so bad that I really felt nothing by the time I was at 12 grade. I just guessed life was uneventful and that that's what happens when you grow up.

I discovered ponies in 10th-ish grade, and it did make me feel a little happy inside. I truly believe this show has had a profound effect of me, it probably fixed my brain. There have been several episodes that have really hit me close to home, and even though I was much older than the target demographic, I still had things to learn. Not friendship lessons, obviously, but lessons about myself. About who I am, who I want to be and how that should be.

The first episode to really hit me was Part of One, since at the time I was feeling really lonely and left out, and it gave me a way to deal with it. And now this one hit me like a truck. It ended up going in a slightly different direction at the end, for obvious reasons, but the entire point still stands.

After graduating I ended up realizing what my decision in 8th grade was doing to me and I decided to try and get my emotions back. I didn't go to a psychologist, I decided that this is a matter I need to settle with my emotions myself, and that the best and most honest solution would come from me.

A few years later today I've regained most of my emotions (still having trouble with joy), and I've been able to handle anger in a way that I do still feel it, but it goes into productive outcomes.

So yeah,

'Cause rainbows won't light up the sky

Unless you let it rain

And candles just won't glow until they're burned

No, you can't give up your laughter

'Cause you're scared of a little pain

It's a lesson that my village never learned

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Thanks MLP for once again making me cry at 1 am.

Submitted October 18, 2018 at 03:29PM by YoureDown
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